December begins a month for me of overwhelming gratitude. I have had this same feeling for the last six years. Grateful for my current place in life wherever it may be. Grateful for the journey that has gotten me here. Grateful for my support system.
Every year, I reminisce about when it was just my mini and I. We had just moved back to New Orleans from Atlanta. It was right before Christmas and we were in a group living type of situation. I was not working yet because it was so close to the holidays. We came with nothing more than some clothes. This would not have been the first year in my daughter’s young life that I was not able to provide Christmas presents for her. To be able to say to her “Mommy, bought you these awesome presents.” I was disappointed but still incredibly grateful we were in a safe place. But to my surprise, the small but strong community I formed around me in the short time we were here prior to Christmas, made sure my baby had something underneath the tree to open. I was truly floored by the generosity of others. I like to reflect on that first Christmas here because I feel like sometimes my generation gets lost in making things (holidays, birthdays, etc.) huge and materialistic, thinking that is what kids want or will remember. My mini does not remember anything she got for that first Christmas, only that we spent it together. Even as she has gotten older that has remained the same. She remembers the antics her elves pull, tree decorating and the annual family Christmas Eve party.
This year has been rough for all of us. So, from a momma that has been through Christmases where there were not as many boxes under the tree as other families, the littles will be okay. They will only remember the times you spent together baking cookies, watching movies, sharing laughs, or having a good snuggle. You are doing your best Momma. I see you.