Single mom, forgive me. I whine and belly-ache about being exhausted because I stay at home with my children while my husband is off working. I feel like I never get a break, except for when I frequent the gym and put my kids in childcare for an hour or two so I can let off some steam and try to unwind from the continuous bickering of a 3 and 4 year old. It seems someone is always hungry, thirsty or needs help finding a loss toy. My days consist of never ending laundry, preparing meals, and cleaning up messes. I complain to my mom friends about how hard this “job” is and how I am way more exhausted than my husband who works all day. I need a vacation, away from the kids and my husband, I just want to have some alone time.
Do I not see how blessed I am to have this life?
Note to self: check the whining and bellyaching at the door and count your blessings instead of problems. Single moms everywhere probably want to shake me for what I think is such a hard NOT life! Recently my husband was away for work for 17 days straight. Solo parenting is hard; I am beat down. Hold on single mom, I don’t want to offend you. I know being alone for 17 days is not even comparable to one day in your shoes. I have a husband that supports our family so I don’t have to work. You, single mom, do the laundry, prepare meals, and clean up messes and work on top of that to provide for your family. Single mom, you do it all, every single day, sometimes working more than one job and I never hear you complain. Shame on me for thinking my life is hard and God bless you for keeping it all together.
I want you to know I truly admire you single mom. I know I don’t have the slightest idea how hard it is for you, but I want to let you know what you do everyday does not go unnoticed. You are strong, you work hard, and you manage to keep it all together. You don’t get a break or to share responsibilities like bath time, cooking meals, etc. I’m sure there might be times you feel like a failure, but shake those thoughts from your head. Don’t ever underestimate how much your children appreciate or admire you. They might not be able to express it yet, but one day they will realize the great lengths you have gone to meet their needs. I honor you single mom, it is clear, love is your motivation!
I want to encourage all of us to reach out to the single moms we know. Send them a note or a card telling them what a great job they are doing. Drop them off dinner one night or offer to babysit for them so they can have a few hours alone to themselves one day. If you are financially able, maybe next time you see a single mom in a restaurant with her kids, you can pick up the bill. There are many other great ways we can show support and love for the single moms. Pay it forward, be a blessing to a single mom and show them some love!
Thank you for posting this. I am a single mom. I work and I’m attending nursing school.
Adrianne, wow! I didn’t even think of attending school on top of everything else. I don’t know you, but I know you are doing everything you can to provide for your family, no matter what! Again, much respect for all you do! When do you find the time to study?
Janie, were you secretly hiding in the car when I had a break down the other day? First came tears of exhaustion. Then came tears of guilt- how dare I lose my patience and complain of exhaustion when my husband works 2 jobs (so that I can stay home) and there are thousands of single parents out there who do this all the time! (My husband, is also a fire captain except in New Orleans.) Once I had a reality check and gave myself a pep talk, “get ahold of yourself!! Are you done yet?! Get a coffee for crying out loud!!” I felt so much better and grateful I do have the support of a spouse!
HUGE kudos to all single parents out there!!! Parenting is the toughest job! Doing it alone is even harder!
Katie, you are hilarious! We definitely are living similar lives. I think what makes it hard for the firefighter wives is that we get use to the help one day and it’s gone the next. The kids miss their dad and mom does too! I have had those pep talks with myself from time to time! I’m going to remind myself when I feel like complaining my 3 year olds favorite quote, “suck it up, buttercup” and take a deep breath and try to recoup! Thanks for sharing!
Janie, my mom helps out so much. She spends time with my son, so I can study. I’ve had a lot of sleepless nights staying up studying. At one point I just wanted to quite but I didn’t and I finished the semester with pretty good grades!