Little New Orleanians Say the Darndest Things

Disclaimer: This post will make you giggle and quite possibly laugh aloud.

I realized – before having children of my own and after many years of tutoring and teaching art classes to young children – that kids are funny. Now, as a mother, I cannot help but chuckle on a daily basis because kids say the darndest things. I reached out to parents via social media to hear their favorite lines from their little comedians. Here are a few that needed to be shared:

Exchanging a laugh
Exchanging jokes – Photo courtesy of Norris Gagnet Photography

Heard at the rear of the church…

Kid (K): Who is that? (Pointing to a statue of a Saint)

Mom (M): A Saint.

K: He doesn’t look like a football player!

Heard at the Audubon Zoo, by the zebra exhibit…

K: Mom, can I have change to feed the ducks?

M: I don’t have any.

K: I can’t wait for pay day!

A 7 year old leans towards a toddler and her mother during mass, fascinated with her long dark locks…

K: Is her hair real or not?

M: Yes.

A New Orleans mother asks her toddler while she cooks in her pretend kitchen…

M: What are you cooking?

K: Gumbo and fried chicken.

When it “snowed” in New Orleans on January 24, 2014…

M: Let’s look out the window. They say it snowed!

K: Did Santa come?!?

After some time on the potty, a mother asks her toddler…

M: What are you doing?

K: Relaxing.

A New Orleans kid struggling with dinner…

K: I want to go to the parades!

M: Not until you eat your dinner!

A toddler looks out the window…

M: What are you doing?

K: Checking the weather.

A family on their way to a restaurant for dinner…

K: Are we going for happy hour? Or sad hour?

During an afternoon stroll with his mother and little brother, a little boy notices a dog…

K: That dog is a mommy. I know because she has big nursers. (Then he continues to provide an anatomy class.)

At the dinner table when there wasn’t enough ketchup on this toddler’s plate…

K: It weawy is tewwible mommy, my wife (life) is weawy tewwible. (Oh, the injustice.)

A toddler attempting to use the potty standing up…

K: Yook! I am a daddy now!

A toddler who thinks her father gets smaller as she grows, similar to Benjamin Button…

K: When I get big and you get little…

A toddler obsessed with zippers and his reaction upon pulling his mom’s skirt zipper…

K: Oh my gooooooodnessssssss!

A toddler and his parents at a doctor’s appointment…

K: The doctors have to give him a diagnosis?

M: Yes

K: Does he have diarrhea?

During Octoberfest…

K: Daddy, I’ll make you a deal. We either go get a pretzel now or we go home.

A toddler asking for forgiveness…

K I’m sorry.

M: Why are you sorry?

K: For being so wonderful.

A hungry toddler…

K: Can I eat my truck?

M: What do you think it would taste like?

K: Orange juice and other stuff like that.

A mother asking about her son’s day at school..

M: What did you do in school today?

K: I suspect I don’t remember.

A toddler telling her grandfather about their skiing adventure

K: Papa! I wanted to go on the lift, but I wasn’t ready…well I WAS ready, but Daddy wasn’t ready.

Said by a loving kid…

K: Mommy, I love you broken pieces.

A few lines from a young comedian…

K: I just don’t like the bugs. They bug me.

K: I’m trying to find the little yellow dump truck, but I don’t know where it is. *pauses* It’s a goner.

K: I don’t have homework! *pauses* Yes I do! I have to play with trucks so so hard!

A mom cooking dinner…

K: Mom, what are we having for dinner?

M: Chicken pot pie

K: Is there pot in it?

(For the record, no, there was not.)

A preschooler asks his teacher at lunch…

K: Why aren’t you all having wine with lunch? My mommy always has wine with lunch.

What has your little comedian said lately?


  1. Jane is very interested in pointing out that her daddy is a boy and I am a girl. She will add that daddy is a boy and he rides in Hermes. Mommy is a girl and she rides in Muses.

    So, we were getting beignets when this very kind gentlemen came up and started talking to her. As he walked off, she stated very matter of factly, “He a boy.” Then, with a tilt of her head, she asked, “What he ride in? Hermes?”

    Nola kids…

  2. Whenever we pass the Zephyr’s field, my son exclaims, “there’s da baseball game! I wanna go there later!” Even if there is no game going on at the moment, he says the same thing. This morning, my hubby was bringing the kids to their summer camp & passed the Z’s field as usual & my son said, “I don’t want to go there anymore b/c they have too many Zephyr’s there.” We have no idea where he came up with that but we both chuckled. 🙂


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