Hold My Door? {A Sign of Loyalty and Trust}

Hold My Door? {A Sign of Loyalty and Trust}

My daughter and I were recently at my son’s swim meet. She had to go to the potty so we went into the girl’s locker room. She went into the stall and echoed out from behind the door, “Hold my door, momma? There’s no lock.”

“You know it,” I said.dscf8344

As I stood there, holding the stall, I shifted my weight to one hip, placed one foot on top of the other, and leaned my head on my arm. I thought of the many, countless days I have had this stance and “held a door.” School bathrooms, movie theater bathrooms, restaurant bathrooms; I have held my share of doors! I’ve held the door for girls who were happy, sad, drunk, scared, hiding from someone, waiting on results, putting on makeup, throwing up – the list is endless. I realized I literally have held the door for my tribe throughout every season of my life. Beginning with friends throughout elementary school, then for my girlfriends throughout high school and college days, toss in the occasional hold for my sister and mom, and now I am holding it for my daughter.

When she looks up she knows, without a doubt, I’m there. She can see my fingers overlapping the top of the door and my feet under the door (dancing for her usually.) She knows no matter how long she may take, I will still be there. Holding the door for her means she’s protected.

A Display of Loyalty

I can remember in school when your best friend held the door, it was a display of loyalty. The person you asked to hold the door was the person you trusted most. Holding the door meant so much more than just making sure no one else can come inside the stall. It meant “I’ve got your back.” That was the person you could trust with your privacy. I know later in life, there will be many others to hold the door for her. She is just starting this door holding journey; as she’s just now in kindergarten this year.

All these thoughts are broken by a loud flush and a giggle as she pulled on the door and my fingers let go of it. I look at her tiny face and can only wistfully hope she has a tribe of friends (or one loyal one) to hold her door and stand behind the simple meaning I have just realized. And to all the girls/women who have held the door for me in my life, “Thank you. Thank you for standing behind me (or in front of me) in so many ways.”


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