Parenting: Expectations vs. Reality

As it is often said, “The best parents are the ones without kids,” and I was no exception. Like most, I had several preconceived notions regarding how I would parent. Not to mention I was a former nanny AND childcare worker, so clearly I had it all figured out.

Little by little over the years, I have adjusted my expectations. As in, most days I no longer expect much more than to feed my kids and keep them alive. I started to think back on my expectations of life with kids versus the reality. It’s hard not to just sit back and laugh at myself. parenting

Expectation: My child will never be allowed to throw a fit in a public place
Reality: We had screaming, tantruming child in the library. The library of all places!

Expectation: If my child does throw a fit in public, I will leave no matter what so as to not annoy other patrons.
Reality: We’ve had more than one grocery store freak out, and no way did I leave. It’s worse on the mom than the other shoppers anyway.

Expectation: My child will sleep in the crib from day one.
Reality: I co-slept with all of my children. In fact, my two-year-old refers to my bedroom as his room.

Expectation: My kids will not eat fast food.
Reality: By age three, my kids could recognize McDonalds, Chick-fil-A and Starbucks based on their logos.

Expectation: I will absolutely spank my child.
Reality: I do not spank my children.

Expectation: My child will not watch TV until he/she is at least two.
Reality: I think we held off for about 9 months with my first. With my second, I didn’t even try.

Expectation: My kids will not wear character clothing.
Reality: Nearly half my son’s wardrobe has characters. At least it’s cool ones, like Avengers or Star Wars.

Expectation: I will never lose my cool and yell at my children the way most mothers do.
Reality: Of course I have. There’s a reason MOST mothers do it.

Expectation: My house will not be overrun with toys.
Reality: On any given day, it looks like Toys R Us threw up in here.

Expectation: You won’t catch me driving a minivan.
Reality: Proud owner of a Honda Odyssey.

Expectation: I will love my kids.
Reality: I love my kids more than I could’ve ever imagined.

What are some parenting expectations you had that do not match up to your reality?


Myndee is a 35ish year old New Orleans area native. She's an author, speaker and self-love advocate. As an introverted extrovert, Myndee loves being part of the generation where most of her friends live in her computer. She and her husband, Luis, live just outside the city with their three kids.


  1. yep. yep. yep. and yep. haha. Except the fast food thing. I am so lucky that Andrew doesn’t really know the difference yet… but he loves some raising cane’s when I surprise him with it! (and he doesn’t like CFA… what’s up with that?)

  2. Oh, lord, yes! I only do minimal characters (never on shoes!) and those are “play clothes” for the most part. I hate Every. Minute. of. it!

    Spanking, yes, I planned to do it. Do I? I could probably count on my hands how many swats they have had between the two of them.

    Tantrums?? My first didn’t, so I thought I was doing GREAT! Then along came Noah. We are considering pre-k anger management. It amazes me the emotion that the child has over some things.

    I think we go in strong, and they wear us down to the stage of “choose your battles”.


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