Timehop :: A Time Capsule of Cringeworthy Updates

I’m a member of the Facebook generation, the population of thirty-somethings who have had an account since the beginning – back when it was www.TheFacebook.com, when it was restricted to college students, and before you could “like” anything.

I remember getting a phone call in 2005 from my best friend who attended a different college, and she told me about this new website where you could virtually friend people you knew and keep up with their lives. It was an upgrade from AOL instant messenger and it sounded awesome – so awesome that I literally wrote an e-mail to Mark Zuckerberg to request that my school was added to the list of universities with access.

Yeah. I was that girl.

College students across the country all signed up, and the Look at Me generation commenced.

It seems with every update Facebook makes, a certain level of dissatisfied griping ensues. People don’t like change … I get it. When the newsfeed was released, I remember feeling like my privacy was being somehow violated. I knew that what I shared on the Internet wasn’t necessarily private, but now instead of having to go to your friend’s profile to Facebook stalk them, everyone was given a real-time feed of every profile change and status update. It appeared as if we were under constant surveillance, a real-life “Big Brother is watching you” moment.

Little did we know that everything we shared was being stored in some sort of internet time-space continuum that would forever remind us that we were never as cool as we once thought.

Enter Timehop

Timehop memories generally serve three purposes:

  1. Remind me of stuff I actually want to be reminded of … my son’s first word for instance.
  2. Remind me how old I’m getting. How on Earth has it been almost 10 years since I graduated college?!
  3. Provide numerous head/desk moments when I cringe at what I used to deem sharable.

I usually check the app daily, and more often than not I come away thinking that I can’t stand my former internet persona. Instead of keeping all of these nuggets of hilariously annoying reminders to myself, I thought I would reintroduce the Internet to some of these gems. I am a member of the Look at Me generation, after all.

The illustrious “is”

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Remember when all of our statuses began with “is?” Oh, and remember when emojis didn’t exist? Good times.

Song lyrics

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Unless you’re a musical theater nerd like me, you may not even realize that this is from a well-respected Tony award winning Broadway musical. Instead, you just think I’ve called someone out for being a piece of trash.

Random rants

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Simmer down! There’s nothing worse than calling someone stupid and then not using proper grammar. Also, never correct someone’s grammar on social media – it’s an unwritten rule.

 Words of wisdom

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Really? I can’t even.

Complaining

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Constant complaining on the Internet is one of my biggest pet peeves. Life is hard – it’s hard for everyone. Try to find the silver linings. Try to focus on the good. Don’t bring others down with your constant updates of negativity … I’m looking at you, former self!

Over-sharing

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Yeah, no one cares. Why I felt the need to document this moment, I’ll never know.

I workout

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Annoying as it may be, I’m still guilty of this one. I own a gym—lay off!

So, thank you Timehop for making me cry sentimental tears of joy and also for providing me the reminder that sometimes the past is better left in the past. It’s an important lesson to us all that none of the stuff we share ever really goes away. Remember that the next time you hit the post button!

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