It’s 10am and my 2 year old and I are watching our daily dose of Sesame Street. He is giggling at Elmo and then decides to take off all his clothes.
I am trying to not lose it on my adorable, and now naked, toddler who is peeing on the floor for the 3rd time today. Yes, 3rd.
Don’t yell. Don’t lose it. He is only two, he is learning. I just grab that disinfectant and take my frustration out on scrubbing away that urine.
It’s now time to pick up the big boys from school. The oldest complains over my choice of music, my middle requests the Moana Soundtrack, all while the toddler screams the whole way home.
Working on a first grader’s homework makes me want to pull my hair out. Exhale. Be patient. He is learning. However, the thought of homework getting harder year by year, I can’t help but panic a little bit. It will get easier, right?
I glance at the clock and it’s close to the witching hours of the night. You know those 2-2.5 hours that are complete chaos. It’s full of complaints about how my son no longer eats chicken (after I bought the huge Costco sized bag) and how my other son is trying to convince me that he doesn’t need to bathe tonight.
And somewhere between bath time and putting pajamas on the 2 year old, he is naked … again.
I try to keep calm as I hear my older two boys fighting with their dad about how they don’t want to go to sleep yet as I am placing the baby in his crib. We go to sleep every night, it’s nothing new. Why is it always a shock when we say it’s bedtime? WHY? Go to sleep boys!
I internally repeat to myself, “please boys don’t wake up the baby, please.”
As I slowly fall into the couch, I hear silence. For once all day, there is silence. And while all I want to do is lay on this couch and watch the latest episode of This is Us, I decide to head to a coffee shop.
You see, I just need a little bit of a break. A break from this house that I’m in 80% of the time since I’m a stay at home mom. A break from someone or something (hello dog) climbing on me at all hours of the day.
I just need some alone time. By myself. Just me, my laptop with headphones and a heavily caffeinated overpriced drink.
I adore my kids and love them to the moon and back but never having a second to myself, I get to a breaking point where I just crave some alone time.
I know this is just a season of parenthood that will soon just be a small glimpse in the big scheme of things. But for right now? I’m exhausted and feel drained. I need some alone time.
Some time where I can just hear myself breathe. Where I can order a treat and not have to share it with three adorable little guys who each just want “a taste” that ends up leaving me with just a bit more than a crumb.
I’m thankful that I have the chance to leave for an hour or so once the kids are asleep. Sometimes I need a change of environment from my house and swagger wagon (Minivan Mom here!).
So next time you see a frazzled mom in her yoga pants at the local coffee shop at 9:30 at night just playing on Facebook and online shopping, don’t judge her. Instead, take a note to do some self care for yourself. In whatever way YOU want to do it.
Give yourself a break, Momma. We all need it from time to time.
How do you give yourself a break?