Diary Of A Bad Mom

I think I read a baby book when I was pregnant. It’s been so long I can’t even remember. Somebody needs to write a book about the hard stuff like “what to do when you don’t understand 1st grade math.” Sometimes all the “helpful” articles online make me feel like I am doing this whole parenting thing wrong. Seven years in I should have it all figured out. WRONG! Instead I can actually list all of the reason why I am a BAD MOM.

My Kids Live Off of Lunchables and Capri Sun Like It’s 1990.

I may be a millennial, but I feed my kids like it’s 1990. When my sweet boys sit down for lunch at school, there are no cute metal bento boxes filled with Pinterest worthy healthy foods. Instead they get a Lunchable, some Oreos, and a Capri Sun pouch. It is super easy and convenient for me to pack 2 lunches every morning. They are picky, and this is what they like. Neither of them get sick very often, and both are healthy heights and weights. Hmmm maybe they don’t get sick because their bodies are preserved from all the additives…….

Artwork and Trinkets Mysteriously Disappear.

We have a lot of stuff in our house. I cannot manage 1000 pieces of paper. While I do  appreciate my kids’ artwork, I can’t save every coloring page or name practice worksheet that comes home. Some of my favorites get hung up in our kitchen, and other favorites go into a certain drawer. At the end of the school year I file the favorites away. The others end up in the backyard trash can. Nobody can stumble upon trashed artwork and get their feelings hurt if it’s outside. Same with trinkets. Sorry but the goody bags from birthday parties only last for a few days, then they “get lost.”

They get a lot of screen time.

My kids love their iPads. They also love watching Sponge Bob and movies. I let them have their screen, and a lot of it. My oldest has found some educational channels on YouTube and has actually learned things from watching it. They go outside. They ride bikes. We keep them active. However, keeping them active is exhausting. Sometimes I just want to watch Friends on Netflix while they watch videos of other kids. Or I need to fold 4 loads of laundry so they watch Captain Underpants.

I Indulge Them

They are only little once. I like to take them to do fun things. During the summer and school breaks, we do ALL THE THINGS. Chick Fil A or pizza for lunch. Birthdays are a big deal. Even their haircuts are an event. While they want to hang out with me, I want to ride all the rides at City Park and play all the games at Chuck E Cheese.

Instead of Watching Their Football Games, I Socialize

I go to every practice and game, but I have no idea what is going on. My mom comes to all the games, and we chit chat and have Bellinis (only on thirsty Thursdays). One of my good friends is also there because her son is on the same team. So we catch up during the hour we’re there. Look, if it is baseball I ALWAYS pay attention when my kids are up to bat. If they play the in field, I pay attention. Football is just too hard to keep track of. So Mama relaxes and has some adult conversation.

While I may feel like I suck a lot, my kids do things that make me feel like I am doing something right. They are sweet, happy, and loving. Even if they will have lots of material for their therapists later in life.

Amanda Blaum
Amanda is her name and sequins are her game. She can never be too extra with fashion or fun. Boymomming keeps her busy. In between playdates and ballpark games, she enjoys dates with her husband of 8 years and girls nights with her mom squad.

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