Decoding Teen Words

Decoding Teen Words

Am I really that old?

As a mom of two teens and a middle school teacher, I often ask myself, “what did they say?” Some things I don’t ask the meaning because let’s be honest, do I even want to know? On the other hand, YES, I need to know! Teenagers today have their own language and you have to crack the code. I’m 43, born in 1981, and can write in cursive. According to the teens I am old, born in the 1900’s and can write like they did in medieval times. Go me!

The confusion sets in

I have cracked the code. Food is appearance and appearance is food. As a mom we still want to look and feel good. I can’t take a selfie to save my life! The outcome is multiple chins, crooked eyes or I am not looking straight. My teen advice, I should practice “mewing.” “Excuse me, are you calling me a cat? Are you saying I should meow?” Mewing is a technique to change the shape of your jawline. Why in the world are these kids working on their jawlines?  Summer is coming and we may try to squeeze in a bit of exercise during our not so free time. Although we may want a “big back” it really means we eat a lot. If you want the big butt you must say “gyatt.” Saying “you ate that” and “left no crumbs” has nothing to do with food. It simply means you killed it! There’s even a teen tax, “phantom tax” also known as stealing food. I wish that sh*t paid my taxes!

Seeking attention

In order to seek out interest you need “rizz” short for charisma. To measure success their friends may say you have “pull.” In old people’s terms, that means “you got game.” To pull you must also have “drip,” good clothes, shoes and accessories. Shoes can’t have creases in them. How are they supposed to walk or participate in PE?

Send help

As I am double checking I have the lingo down I’ve been told I am not allowed to speak like them. “Bruh, you can’t say that.” I have officially gone from Mommy, Mom, Bruh. Note to self…pick your battles. This is the same generation of kids who watched people unwrap toys on YouTube and are now watching toilet head videos. You may have heard the words “skibidi toilet.” A cartoon head that pops out of a toilet speaking. The guy is making millions. What the hell! I definitely chose the wrong profession. I am sure you are thinking, “bet,” yeah right, no lies.

As I sit back and decipher all of their terms it makes me wonder if our parents felt the same way? What words are your kids using that leave you feeling ancient?

Brandy Baham
Brandy is a Single Mom of two, Riley (14) & Cruz (13) and resides in St. Charles Parish. She has a degree in Psychology from Holy Cross College and is an ELA teacher. During her free time she can be found cheering on her kids in whatever extra activity they are participating in. For fun she likes to try new local restaurants.


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