An in DEPP look at the most unHEARD-of Trial

If you have not watched any clips of the current Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard trial, stop reading and Google. Actually, read this first and then watch.

The details of this case are shocking and disturbing but yet, this trial has become a spectacle of hilarity. I have not laughed out loud so much at something that is supposed to be taken so seriously. Let me say, I obviously do not condone domestic abuse, alcoholism, drug use, none of it – so I am putting all of that aside and want to focus on the hilarity that the trial has brought to social media. Domestic violence is NEVER funny. This trial is sad.  But most would not disagree on the fact that Johnny is hilarious. The sarcasm and disdain dripping out of Johnny Depp’s mouth is nothing short of amazing acting. It honestly seems like I am watching a trial satire movie.

Finding the humor in a tough situation, just like Johnny often states he does: He responds to difficult situations with humor. 

Here are the things we all can learn from this trial:

  1. It is never okay to go #2 anywhere but a toilet (or a diaper if you are a baby or an elder).
  2. It is weird to wear the same clothes as your ex the day after you bump into them.
  3. You cannot object to someone answering your own question.
  4. Happy hour is any time of the day.
  5. During happy hour, it is only appropriate to drink ‘mega–pints’ of wine.
  6. Tears will only produce if you are telling the truth about your deep sadness.
  7. It is important to remember all the jobs you have had.
  8. Jars are not always meant to hold illegal items.
  9. Perform a background check on anyone you begin dating.
  10. Removing yourself from a toxic relationship can actually make you appear younger.
  11. Hearsay is information received from other people that one cannot adequately substantiate.
  12. Don’t vape in your car while testifying for a trial via Zoom.
  13. While scary and inappropriate, attacking a cabinet is not illegal.
  14. No need to ask if you are reading anything correctly. Someone will stop you if you say anything wrong or misread.

On a serious note, this is a real-life reminder that women can also be abusive and men can be victims, too. Domestic abuse has no stereotype. It can happen to anyone, anytime, anywhere regardless of your race, sex, education level, age, etc. It is a human rights issue that needs to be fought.

My name is Erika Lockhart and I am married to my best friend and favorite pain in the butt, Chris. We have two children - our boy, Zane, who is 6 years old going on 21, and Finnley who is almost 1 years old. We also have one 4 – legged child - Nelson a pit bull/German shepherd mix and we just recently lost our beloved American Bulldog, Laney. I was born and raised in Harvey, on the Bestbank, but now live in Metairie. I am full time employee for a healthcare consulting company where I lead the New Jersey Market in provider engagement efforts from my home office here in NOLA. I enjoy taking vacations, going on road trips, my monthly girls dinner club and my favorite hobby is spending the weekends with my kids and the family. Odd facts about me - I love watching Judge Judy, I want to be on jury duty as much as possible, I have an obsession with mayonnaise and I love doing homework.


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