What’s in a (Former Married) Name?

What is in a name? Or an email address? Maybe have had the same AOL one for years. Or maybe you got your email address in 2003 from Yahoo and never looked back. I technically have three … my original pre-married email, my former married email, and my work email. When I married, I fully transitioned to my married email, which is the username: jcwilloz, using my former married name.

Well, when I was no longer married, I elected to change back to my maiden name, which needs updating in so many places legally and socially post-divorce (SO. MUCH. PAPERWORK.)

And even though I have my original maiden name email address, transitioning back to it was low on my to-do list. And now, I’m not sure if I will ever change it.

What’s the reason? One is seven and the other is five. The girls have mentioned how they wish they had the same last name as me. And I have certainly grappled with my choice to return to my maiden name. I have different reasons. Partly, maybe mostly, I needed the name change to aid in the transition. I did think about my children. I knew that monogrammed last name towels and door hangers would probably be out of the question, because it would be a C not a W.

That sounds trivial, but it represents the larger issue of me fearing my children will not feel fully connected to their Mother. Me.

My children’s middle names are my own middle and last name; I bring that up to them so can feel the connection.

All of this, however, brings me to this post. I was updating my account information for the Krewe of Nyx when Julie Lea, our Captain, reminded us to update our account information. This is the moment to change it over to my work email, which I use often.

Instead, I’m going to keep it. It is my children’s last name. And I want to show them that I have not shunned their last name. In fact, my business “does business” as 7602 Business Performance. But I still legally file / invoice as Willoz Consulting. And I don’t anticipate changing that either. My children are Willoz’s and I am still proud of that name, because I still care for many Willoz’s, because it was once mine, and more importantly … it belongs to them.

Julie Couret
Nola Native, Julie Couret is Mom of Emma Mae (12) & Helen (10) and partner to her long term boyfriend Tom. She co-parents with her ex-husband & is known for candid posts on her life behind the scenes. Julie is self-employed an Executive Coach who works with business owners leading strategic planning sessions, management training, leadership development, and change management. She loves road trips with her kids, playing tourist in her own city, and riding in her parade Krewe Cleopatra!

2 COMMENTS

  1. To each their own. I couldn’t wait to go back to my maiden name. I’ve discussed it with my kids and it’s no big deal.

    • Exactly. I love my maiden name – so was happy to use it again…keeping my official business name as my former married and my personal email as my former married just seemed to make sense to me and ease the transition for my kiddos. And who knows, when they are older they may tell me they could literally care less and all my fretting was for nothing! Lol And thanks for reading my post! Have a great day!! 🙂

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