The Secret to Becoming a Native New Orleanian

I was chatting away one morning at our neighborhood CCs with a local mom who asked me if I was born and raised in New Orleans. I proudly responded, “Yes!” However, it struck me at that very moment; my children will not be able to answer the same. As they have settled into their new hometown, I have taught them the “proper” way to say things, what foods to eat, how to dress and other tidbits to become native New Orleanians. Here is a collection of things that make our town so unique from the rest of the country.

How to eat and cook like a native New Orleanian…

Andouille is the only sausage that exists

Choose petit fours before cupcakes and beignets before doughnuts

It all starts with the roux

Red beans and rice on Mondays

Jambalaya does not come from a box

Always have canned food and bottled water in the pantry, hurricane season or not

Eat a po-boy in lieu of a hoagie, and they must be “dressed”

Snowball, not Italian ice

Buttermilk drops from McKenzie are the best doughnuts in the world

Fried turkey is the acceptable way to celebrate Thanksgiving

How to talk like a native New Orleanian

“Suck da head” is an appropriate expression

You will be called “boo,” “darlin'” or “honey” at least once a day by a stranger

Supper instead of dinner

Catty corner in lieu of kitty corner

Lagniappe is a synonym for extra

Yes, there are four seasons: crawfish, shrimp, crab and oyster

“Who Dat?!” means “Hi,” “Bye,” “How ya’ doing,” and everything else in between

Makin’ groceries, not grocery shopping

Coke in lieu of pop

Y’all versus You (Yes, we know “you” is already plural.)

“Yes ma’am” and “No sir,” always

Go is really spelled “Geaux”

How to dress like a native New Orleanian

Dressing down means boys wear khaki shorts, loafers with no socks and a shirt with a NOLA emblem; for example, a fleur de lis, water meter or pelican that is most probably from Storyville

Children must own at least one smocked dress or jon jon, or not

No need to invest in a winter wardrobe

Seersucker suits are always in fashion

Black and gold is the only acceptable color combination to wear on Sundays during football season

Purple, green and gold do indeed match

Know the city and geography like a native New Orleanian

New Orleans is also known as the Crescent City

There are no counties; Louisiana has parishes

The “Eastbank” and “Westbank” are not necessarily on the east and west bank of the river

Cemeteries are above ground for a reason

Watch out for streetcars when crossing the street

There is a difference between Creole and Cajun

Neutral ground in lieu of median

Metry is also known as Metairie

If you can pronounce and spell Tchoupitoulas, then technically you know a second language

Other things a native New Orleanian should know

Mardi Gras is not a national holiday

During football season, ALL of your gatherings will revolve around Saints and LSU game times

Whether you are 16, 35 or 60, if someone asks you “Where did you go to school?” it means where did you go to high school

There should be K&B Purple in your crayon box

Mosquitoes, caterpillars, roaches and termites outnumber New Orleanians 100 to 1

What other things should non-natives know to become a “native” New Orleanian?