There’s a meme floating around about how people should be using this time to better themselves. I thought to myself that whoever made that meme couldn’t be human! As I sit here with my “half -empty” glass of Rose’, I can’t help but say “I’m Not OK, but that’s OK.” Are you freaking kidding me? I lost a husband 5 months ago, have an almost 5-year-old and we are trying to survive a pandemic. If you didn’t get the memo, let me make it clear, “It’s OK to NOT be OK.” Give yourself grace. A whole lot of it. The mere fact that you are reading this blog should be proof.
From the first day that I decided to share this journey with you, I knew that I wanted it to be REAL. I wanted you to see that even though it appears that I’m “Superwoman,” I’m a human being. One morning I can wake up ready to take on the biggest wave of grief and the next morning, I’m drowning. It’s OK to NOT be OK. One morning I’m ready to be a mommy to my son, and the next morning I want to be a little girl again with my daddy telling me that “everything is going to be ok.” This is life.
I too, am having a hard time being alone at this time. It’s not easy. There’s only so much Netflix that a girl can watch! I am blessed to have a supportive family and circle of friends, oh and my therapist. This pandemic and isolation can be triggering to many. For New Orleanians, this may bring back memories of Hurricane Katrina. We were separated from family and lost loved ones. Some of us are still dealing with that trauma. Some of us may have already been dealing with depression or anxiety before COVID. It is OK to NOT be OK.
We should not feel ashamed to admit that we are struggling, especially not right now. I never liked hugs and needed my personal space. Guess what I really want these days? A hug. So many of us are having a hard time without physical touch. It is OK to admit that you are NOT OK.
Our kids may also be having a tough time. They don’t understand why they cannot see grandma or can’t have play dates. I’ve learned so much over the last 5 months about expressing feelings. Encourage your children to talk about their feelings. Talk with your children about your feelings. It’s OK to NOT be OK.
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. Let this be your reminder to be kind to yourself. Give yourself grace. You are Not Alone. If you need to reach out, call the NAMI Helpline at 1-800-950-NAMI.