When Online Comments Sting

We are a team of bloggers. So that means that we routinely put our lives, thoughts and emotions on the table for every mom of New Orleans to read. We have never said we are experts, psychologists, pediatricians, lactation consultants, or even worthy of casual mother of the year awards. We are all just moms doing exactly what you are doing. We are figuring it out as we go and hoping that we are raising children that will be successful one day, each in their own way.

But, part of this blogging gig means that we get to see, talk with, and have conversations with moms around the city of New Orleans. There are fabulous events, community play dates, and friendships made through this site. We regularly hear that women have met good friends via our events and neighborhood community groups. And that makes us very, very happy.

But there is also a dark and unpleasant side of blogging.

mobile-phone-FINALIt is the side where people are hidden behind a computer screen and feel they are protected behind a screen name. While most often the comments and conversations on our social media channels are amazing and uplifting, there are other times when the comments are hurtful, non-constructive, and just downright mean.

Think before you type, please.

Would you really say that to a mom on the playground? A mom in your kid’s class? To a mom in the checkout line at Rouse’s? What are you really trying to accomplish by lashing out at another mom who has taken her time to share her emotions with you? We recognize and value diversity of opinion; heck, the 27 of us who make up New Orleans Moms Blog don’t agree on any one issue.

But … it’s all in HOW you say it.

You may not necessarily agree with one of our position’s or tactics or thoughts, and we KNOW that we are all raising our kids differently with a variety of parenting styles and priorities. That’s what makes the world go round, and we need to remember and respect that. We are all loving our little New Orleans babies so much that it hurts. So let’s keep the hurt there. There are enough road blocks in our motherhood journey without tearing each other down. Every mom has their burdens, their struggles, and is their own worst critic … so keep that in mind.

Just because you feel that you are doing what is best for your child, it does NOT mean that a mom doing the total opposite is wrong. We are both actually right if we’re doing what we believe is best for our kids. Isn’t that amazing? And isn’t it a blessing that we have the right to pursue diverse parenting styles?

Let’s take a moment to reflect on the fact that we are so quick to shame bullying situations with our kids, but we often don’t consider mom bullying. Are online comments the new way to tear down other moms virtually? Just because a mom is willing to put herself out there, it doesn’t mean that she is inviting criticism. Respectful discussion, yes. But harsh criticism, no.

Think for a second if your everyday parenting was put under a microscope.

Would you be the perfect combination of Martha Stewart, Carol Brady and Lorelai Gilmore? Probably not, and neither are we. We are real moms with circles under our eyes, spit up on our shirts, and sporting yoga pants even though we are not heading to the gym. We are drinking iced coffee by day and wine by night. We are in the parenting trenches WITH you, doing our very best.

I know on any given day, I am questioning my own parenting styles and tactics. I am crossing my fingers and hoping that I am making the right decisions. I am doing a pretty good job of beating myself up on getting impatient with my children, forgetting to pack the towel for swimming at camp, and not doing her hair for crazy hair day. Don’t worry; I have the beating myself up part handled, and I really don’t need someone else to do that for me.

Every topic that we share is not for everyone. We know that. We get that. But something that you may not agree with or have interest in could completely resonate with the mom next door. That is exactly why we have so many contributors. We are all different, and we don’t necessarily agree all the time, but we can respect each other. And, we hope that our readers can respect the New Orleans Moms Blog community and the resources that we offer to all moms in this space.

Let’s keep it clean, constructive and a place where we want to share.



Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here