Sometimes life throws you a curveball. Between the kids, husband, work, home, trying to go to crossfit, and also fitting in time for fun, you tend to lose track of things. This happened recently to me. I mean after having many doctors tell me that I would never have children on my own, why would I keep track of my cycles? Oh … because I might actually ovulate. And get pregnant. With a completely unexpected third child. I feel like such a fraud because I just wrote a post about infertility! And here I sit, pregnant.
I can still remember my high risk doctor say to me, “You know my fertility patients are my best return customers, right?” I laughed at him and said, “Nah. That will never happen to me.” When I saw his wife (my regular ob) for my first appointment, she said her husband sends his congratulations and pretty much said, “told ya so.” So here I begin this crazy journey of baby 3. I really thought all the days of morning sickness, exhaustion and maternity clothes were behind me.
After #2 arrived, I thought I was so done with babies. I gave away all my maternity clothes. As soon as she was done with a piece of baby gear, I found a willing person to take it because I just wanted it all out of my house. I gave away all my baby clothes. I drive a Prius because it was the perfect size for my family of 4. We have 3 bedrooms in our house, which gave each child their own room. There are so many things we now need to rethink!
My first two times around, I really wanted girls. I wanted sisters because it was something I never had and always wanted. But now, since number 3 is a surprise, I’m up for anything. Given my designation of, “advanced maternal age,” (aka old) we will have early genetic testing done and will find out if I’m having a boy or girl by 11 weeks. Part of me hopes that it’s another girl because I already know what to do. But, at the same time, I really don’t care that much if I have a boy or girl. I’m still in shock over it all and will just go by what I tell my girls, “You get what you get, and you don’t get upset.”
I was sure when I went in for my first appointment that my doctor was going to tell me I was just crazy and totally not pregnant at all. Even though I knew I was. She did a bunch of blood work early on to confirm it all. And confirm it did. I’ve felt sick, exhausted and awful. I swore all of this was just my mind playing tricks. So when she did the ultrasound and showed me one little baby with a perfect heart beat, I said, “Oh look. There really is a baby.” My doctor just laughed. She could tell I was still not sure of it all. And I’m still not sure of it all, but I’m embracing this miracle. But I do know: I will heed my doctor’s warning next time. I don’t think I could handle a surprise #4!