Don’t Pluck Your Eyebrows and Other Words of Wisdom for My Daughter

To my sweet, silly daughter:

You are just a couple of weeks shy of your 7th birthday, and currently asking me things like, “Why do you shave your legs?” and “What do you think I’m going to be when I grow up?” You still look to me for answers and hang on mama’s every word. There will come a day in the not-so-distant future, however, when you will think you know more than me. When that day comes, and you may or may not decide to shut me out, please consider the following advice.

Don’t pluck your eyebrows.

The “90s Gwen Stefani” look might make a comeback one day but trust me when I tell you to leave the eyebrows out of it. You might want to just steer clear of the tweezers until you’re old enough to vote. By then you MIGHT be mature enough to handle that kind of responsibility.

Don’t take the body and skin you have for granted.

Appreciate and nurture them now and throughout every stage, you are in. They will change slowly over the years but one day you’ll wish you’d been kinder to your features years ago.

Don’t feel ashamed of your changing body.

Even as a late bloomer, I still felt bizarre and awkward in my new skin. I hope you feel comfortable talking to me about any concerns you have during what can sometimes be a confusing time.

Don’t let anyone who points out your “flaws” make you feel bad.

They are most likely projecting their own insecurities onto you. Mama and Lizzo give you permission to respond accordingly with, “I’m sorry you’re so miserable you feel the need to bring me down with you but I’m feelin’ good as hell so mind your own damn business.”

Don’t “ghost” anyone

partners, friends, potential job employers. It’s rude and immature. It takes guts but you will feel proud that you were brave and honest enough to provide closure for both sides.

You don’t have to stay friends with your ex.

If someone tells you they just want to be friends, give your heart time to heal. If they want to have their cake and eat it, too, don’t let them string you along. Find the strength to cut ties and move on.

Don’t prove the haters right.

If someone ever tells you that you can’t do something, let that be the fuel to your fire. Turn that negativity into a passion and don’t let them dim your light.

Don’t ignore your gut.

That sinking feeling and little voice whispering, “I don’t think this is such a good idea” is there for a reason. It’s a survival technique, and your subconscious telling you to make a different choice. Listen to it.

Don’t let the bullies win.

If you see someone being bullied, try to take a stand. It’s not enough to just stand up for yourself. Others may not have the courage and strength that you do.

You don’t have to give your whole heart to the first dreamy guy that looks your way.

If he ever says “I love you” and “Why do we have to wait so long?” in the same breath, please understand that is not love. Patience and understanding is love.

Don’t be intimidated to try new things just because someone may be better at them than you.

They have most likely been working hard and practicing for years. Your beginning is their middle. You may not be good … yet.

All of this to say, this is YOUR future … take my advice, don’t take my advice; just own it. Set fire to your path. If you happen to misstep (or over-tweeze), mama will be there to tame the flames and help you fill in some killer brows.

Kathryn Seibert is a Certified Parent Coach with Grow As A Parent. She discovered peaceful parenting when she realized the authoritarian way of parenting didn’t feel right but she didn’t know another way. She works with parents to end powers struggles and find joy and cooperation in the home by parenting in a more calm and connected way. You can find ways to work with her at


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